As I mentioned previously, I canceled my home phone (landline) and went strictly wireless. I thought everything was well and good…until the bill came.

What a nightmare!

First, the electronic bill (e-Bill) that I get via email each month was about 50% more than normal. Confused at why the bill was so high, I went to check my account online. Nothing! Yeah, exactly, I had nothing listed there. My old apartment address was listed as well as my apartment phone number but neither my home nor my wireless accounts were anywhere to be found. I’ve been paying my bill online for several years with no problems, so who knows what happened to my account information.

I called Cincinnati Bell to get things fixed. First, the lady I spoke with told me the amount I owed was two thirds less than the bill I had received. Great! Oh, but she couldn’t see my home phone bill, only my wireless, so I may still owe more. What?!? The amount she gave me for the wireless bill was what I usually paid for my home and wireless together. I should not owe more. So I ask her why my accounts aren’t showing up online. After being on hold for a while, she told me that since I closed my home phone account and since my wireless plan was apparently attached to that account, I’d have to add my wireless account to the online system. Huh? I did that while she was on the phone, but once it was added, it said I had a zero account balance and my last payment was in Feb 2002. Arg! I asked her to fix this and again I was put on hold. Seemingly forever later she came back and said that she couldn’t fix this issue, that I’d have to email tech support from the website. Whatever… I was at work, so I had to go for the time being.

I get home that day and find a Cincinnati Bell letter in the mail. Yes, it’s a bill. I can’t remember the last time I’ve gotten a bill in the mail from them. Of course I would get one now. What was especially great about this bill (sarcasm) was that it was for a different amount than the e-Bill and what the customer service rep told me. So now I had three different amounts due. Errr…

Still not seeing any information via the website, I decide to try to get information from their automated “Anytime” service using the phone. Yeah, well, no matter which phone number I enter, wireless or my landline, the system said it couldn’t bring up my account.

Three different bill amounts and I can’t get any information about the bill anywhere.

I call back again today needing to pay the bill (it’s due tomorrow). First guy I talk to is clueless. He’s just the “home phone service” guy - he can’t see my wireless account balance - so he transfers me to their wireless department. The wireless guy is a little more knowledgeable, but is ultimately as fruitless. When I ask for the final balance for both the wireless and home phone services, I’m put on hold for a looong time. He comes back to say that they’re still checking into it, but he wasn’t able to get my account up on the website or the Anytime line either. What, did he not believe me?!? More hold time… He comes back and they’re still checking it and I’m on hold again. Finally, he gets another lady on the phone who gives me a balance (the same as the one I received in the mail) and she takes my payment information. The matter should be settled, but we’ll see next billing cycle.

Now, why can’t any of these people see my total account balance if I personally was able to in the past? Why is there a “wall” between the two departments that prevents them from seeing my composite bill? Why can’t I pay online anymore? If these accounts are so separate that one customer service rep can’t pull up both of the accounta, then why were both trashed when I canceled my landline?

And to think I was using my peak wireless minutes - I was on the phone over half an hour - trying to get this straightened out.

This really bakes my noodle!